So while living in London after rejecting the Bad Boy Brit I hung out with Abercrombie (as I have nicknamed him because he wears abercrombie and looks like an abercrombie model). Abercrombie is 6’4″ and absolutely gorgeous. I texted him about hanging out, as he had asked me to do. We went to a club in Covent Garden together. I was dressed in my sexiest black dress and looking fine. We were going out as friends, but knew we liked each other so the protocal was a little awkward. Finally through the haze of alcohol and booty dancing we began making out. I also find it funny that women in England don’t booty dance as we do in the states. They just bounce awkwardly to the music. I don’t know how they have any fun.

Finally we leave around 2 am, and he lives in the suburbs so he would have to spend a few hours on a night bus to get home. I invite him back to mine to sleep on the floor. I share a bedroom with another girl. We get there, and he is just the friendliest guy so he befriends her right away. We all end up sitting on my bed together watching a movie as if it is perfectly normal, so she lets him stay. I finally decide to let him share my bed. He is in his boxers, and we’re squished into this tiny one person bed, which leads to some cuddling. In the morning it leads to some mild fooling around, since my roommate is present. Finally I see him out.


At our next spinning group the Bad Boy Brit is constantly trying to get my attention, and I try to always be speaking to someone else whenever he is near. Near the end of the group he asks to speak to me, so I do. He awkwardly confronts me about why I canceled our date, and I try to explain, but he gets very upset and strange and finally storms off. Later he texts me to apologize. Let’s just say in the future he chases me with fire at a fire burning party, asks me to be part of a threesome, tries to facebook friend me, and then texts me a month later to try again to ask me to drinks. Yeah, like I would say yes to that.

Abercrombie and I continue dating. We go to Primrose Hill and Camden Market on a great date, and hang out each week at the spinning group. Finally he invites me to come to his place for the night which I accept. Details on that later.

I have found the World’s Cutest Condom Store, and I never thought such a thing would even ever exist. My friend’s and I (and I say friends lightly because the girls I traveled with were annoying as hell) went to Amsterdam for a weekend. Walking around one night near the Red Light District we found this adorable store. They had cute little condoms made into to all different animals, statues and shapes. It was cute as hell, and we swore to come back when they were open.

We did come back and we found more cute things. Condoms that were inside of chestnut shells, and more adorable animal condoms. They also sold almost every brand of condom out there, as well as female condoms, and vibrating cock rings. It was safe sex heaven. Also the animal condoms are only for decoration, and not safe for sex. I forget the name, but if you’re ever in Amsterdam I recommend you find this store.

My froggy condom!

Badboy Brits

Upon moving to London I joined a circus spinning group. I am currently a hula hooper, and can do many tricks with my hoop. When I first joined the group I met a gorgeous british man who I call abercrombie, one because he looks like an abercrombie model, and two because he wears a lot of abercrombie. He seemed to be flirting with me, until the badboy brit of the group started to flirt with me way more. I love the attention so I continued to flirt with the badboy as well, who is a metal head rocker boy. The group spent a night on the beach of the Thames spinning fire (because that’s what weird fire spinners do on Friday night), and I drunkenly made out with said badboy.

Shortly after that badboy called me to ask me out. He was very shy about it, which at the time was adorable. Next spinning group he is hanging all over me, acting possessive, getting physical, and talking all about how much money he is going to spend on me on our date. He even was saying that if I spent the night at his place he would sleep on the couch. We have not gone on a date yet, so stop assuming I’m coming home with you either way. By the end of the night I knew I was going to cancel the date.

Rockin in Budapest!

I texted him a day later to say that I was sorry, but I was hung up on my ex boyfriend in the states and didn’t feel right going out with him. A pussy move I know, but the man literally has a fire sword. Yeah, a sword that lights on fire. My rule of thumb try not to piss off men with swords. He then starts texting me trying to convince me to come out with him as friends and to see if it progresses from there. He starts calling me as well, and begging me to pick up. I decline of course. I’m sorry, but to be this crazy before we’ve been on a date is strange. People think women are crazy, but men are just as much so. Though by canceling my date it did leave me time to spend with Mr. Abercrombie. Details to come at a later posting. Let’s just say he looks like an abercrombie model with his shirt off as well.

Mysteries of Men

I am currently living London, where I have had many fun exploits. Recently though I met someone amazing. If you are reading this and think this is going to be some love full gaga story, don’t worry, it won’t be. I have recently started attending burning events throughout Europe. They are spin offs of Burning Man in the States. (Yes I say the States, I live in London. I also say chips, crisps, and where is the toilet.) At the London Burner Party I met this fabulous guy. He was funny, sweet, and somewhat sexy. The party goes until 7 am, but around 3:30 am we were both tired, so he asked me back to his place. I went on the condition that he understand I would not have sex with him. He accepted this and we spent an amazing night fooling around, a great morning, and around 1 pm he took me to breakfast and then drove me home. Also he is the world’s best cuddler. We wake up just as we fell asleep, with my head on his chest.

The John Lennon Wall in Prague

Later that day he texted to ask me out for that week. He took me to a gorgeous restaurant, at which he had made a reservation. We went for drinks, and again went back to his place to only fool around. When I get home the next day I receive a text telling me what a wonderful time he had. I go out of town and he continues to text me while I’m away for a week. On our next date, after having a nice Italian lunch, going to an art gallery, and getting cake and coffee we finally sleep together, and the sex is amazing. Afterwards he wants to keep the light on so he can just look at me. He smiles at me like I’m amazing, and for the first time in a long while I am not just bored with him after sex, because I find him truly interesting. We are both into theater and art.He texts me multiple times the next day saying things like “What an amazing eve. And great way to wake up 😉 Thank you. Have a good dayxx” and later that day “Been smiling to myself all day. Couldn’t concentrate for toffee”.

We get together another night for more mind blowing sex, and he comes on bottom, which he says is a first for him. We have more great morning sex as well. Then he texts me “Haven’t stopped smiling all day! Thank you for a great night.” When he is gone that weekend he texts me “missing your sexyness” as well as “God sex was good Wednesday”, and after he texts me to ask how I am doing I here nothing back from him for days. This starts to get more strange as he doesn’t reply to anything I’ve sent. I start to wonder if he has lost his phone. Normally I would just think a guy is blowing me off, but this seems a strange point to blow me off at. I finally leave him a voicemail with my phone number in case he lost his phone. I get a text that night saying “Soz for the lack of communication. Work has been an arse and sent me to Barcelona on Monday and just landed at heathrow, just heading home. Absolutely buggered. You around this weekend x” I text him back which days I am free. Then I hear nothing from him. On Friday I text him “You want to do something this weekend? I could use some great sex after the long week I’ve had.” I hear nothing. This all seems very strange to me. A few days later I text him to ask him why the disappearance, and if he is blowing me off could I just have a reason. I let him know since I’m only here for a little while I’m just in this for fun and sex. Still I have heard nothing.

This has screwed with my head way more than the normal guy blow off. This guy seemed ridiculously into me. The sex was amazing, and he stopped talking to me at an odd point. He was the one texting me about missing me, and how great sex was. Then BOOM nothing. And then when he does respond about Barcelona, nothing after that, even after he asked about my weekend plans. I have started to think that he was just playing me from the beginning, which if so men have become even better actors. After years of dating in NYC I thought I could generally judge a man using me, but this one didn’t change even right after sex, but literally mid text conversation. If you have any idea as to what happened, please let me know. I’m at the point where I just feel he was a user, but at the same time I can’t believe a guy would go this far into acting, and the after follow through. So what the hell happened? (I have even more cutesy texts than that, but I thought I’d spare you)

So when my sexy older man is going down on me he started to do something with my feet I wasn’t used to. He would put them around his penis with his hands, and start to move them in a way that I was basically giving a foot job. Now this does not bother me at all. I’m not really into foot fetishes as can be seen in my previous posts, but a foot job turned out to be a lot easier than a hand job. He did most of the work, and I let him use my feet. Plus he was able to eat me out while he did this.

Feet seem to becoming more and more prevalent in our society. More and more often I’m meeting men who admit to liking feet. Now not all of them want to suck on my toes like one of my ex’s, but it seems each man has a different version of a foot fetish. Some just want to touch them, some want to suck on your toes, and some want a foot job. I honestly cannot understand the appeal of a woman’s feet. They are smelly and not that attractive, but I guess they are today’s new it body part. Men please explain this to me.

Soon I learned my sexy older man had an even more selective foot fetish. One night he asked me to bring over stockings. I luckily have a nice pair of black thigh highs with bows on the top. I wore them for him and after I had finished during sex he used my feet to give himself a foot job again. Afterwards he explained that he has had this fetish of stocking foot jobs most of his life. He especially likes white stockings.

Later when discussing this with a friend she admitted to dating a guy with the same fetish, but with her once she had done it once she was expected to do it every time. Her guy would pout and whine if she did not have stockings. Luckily my sexy older man is not like this. I have done it once so far, and am willing to do it again but he never presses the issue much.

But when did stocking foot jobs become the IT foot fetish, and does it really feel more awesome than a vagina or a mouth?

So blow jobs are often the bane of every woman’s existence. I have never had much problem with them before, until recently. I like oral as an appetizer to sex, but not the main course. Recently though I began dating my sexy older man. At first he pleased me a bunch because it seemed like he was a guy who just wanted to go down on a girl a ton. Yay. Sometimes though the oral began going on for too long. I like oral like any girl, but at some point if I haven’t come yet, I’m not going to and instead I’m bored.

New MexicoThen he started wanting blow jobs to go on forever. He also has a very large penis which makes this more aggravating. He also asks for blow jobs by asking if you will “kiss him”. Something is irksome about that, but it is better than a guy who pushes your head toward their dick. Those guys my friends and I say we will never blow.

At some point during blowing him I would finally beg him to fuck me, but instead he just wanted to finish off orally. This is especially true for when we were doing 69. I know hardly any women who actually enjoy 69. The position is awkward and slightly gross. I would rather take turns, and honestly I don’t even notice what is going on with my vagina when I am trying to suck someone else off.

Luckily this has all gotten a bit better, and we’ve found a happy medium. But it just sucks when a man who is terrific at sex and who has a huge penis just wants oral because then we women just feel like we’re missing out.

My Sexy Old Man

So I recently began a summer fling with a man most people would deem too old for me. We hang out at the same bar, and share many of the same friends. I didn’t know or think about his age when we first began to hit it off. I’m twenty-one, and often date guys in their early thirties.

One night I go home with him, and we fool around a bit, and then lie and talk for a while. Finally I ask him his age. He has me guess, and I say around 28 29. He admits a few moments later that he is older than that… by ten years. I’m lying in bed with someone who is 38. He’s basically old enough to have fathered me. At the same time he is interesting and smart. He builds websites for a living and is a vegetarian, recycles everything, and rides a bike everywhere. Generally a good guy, says my friends who have known him a while. (P.S. riding a bike everywhere ensures that you have a rocking body at 38).

Who doesn't love the muppets?Now in our society where do we draw a line on age gaps? My mother has always been okay with my dating guys in their early thirties, but I know this would be too much for her to handle. Also I am soon moving to London, so no matter what this is only a summer fling.

Should we not date men nearly 20 years older than us?

I could date a guy my own age for the summer who treats me like crap, or I could date a man much too old for me who bought me a toothbrush to have at his apartment on the second weekend I was there. Is it better to date a nice guy, or an appropriate guy?

For now I’m sticking with my sexy older man. Plus watching him sing Young Girl at karaoke was hilarious, and completely appropriate.