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Posts Tagged ‘hand job’

So blow jobs are often the bane of every woman’s existence. I have never had much problem with them before, until recently. I like oral as an appetizer to sex, but not the main course. Recently though I began dating my sexy older man. At first he pleased me a bunch because it seemed like he was a guy who just wanted to go down on a girl a ton. Yay. Sometimes though the oral began going on for too long. I like oral like any girl, but at some point if I haven’t come yet, I’m not going to and instead I’m bored.

New MexicoThen he started wanting blow jobs to go on forever. He also has a very large penis which makes this more aggravating. He also asks for blow jobs by asking if you will “kiss him”. Something is irksome about that, but it is better than a guy who pushes your head toward their dick. Those guys my friends and I say we will never blow.

At some point during blowing him I would finally beg him to fuck me, but instead he just wanted to finish off orally. This is especially true for when we were doing 69. I know hardly any women who actually enjoy 69. The position is awkward and slightly gross. I would rather take turns, and honestly I don’t even notice what is going on with my vagina when I am trying to suck someone else off.

Luckily this has all gotten a bit better, and we’ve found a happy medium. But it just sucks when a man who is terrific at sex and who has a huge penis just wants oral because then we women just feel like we’re missing out.

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Ten Dating Rules:

  1. Be yourself. Unless yourself is bat shit crazy. Then just be a tiny bit toned down version of yourself.
  2. Dress somewhere between prude and slut on a first date. Cover up some, but try to show a good amount of cleavage. Even if you’re sitting at a table the whole time he can see your cleavage. (If you’re flat chested like me use those gooey inserts that clasp in the middle that give you instant cleavage, plus a push up bra).
  3. Your parents were right “He’s after one thing, and one thing only”. ALWAYS. Just assume it.
  4. Guys want what they can’t have. For years I didn’t want relationships, so guys always wanted me. Whenever I want one is when it is harder to get one.
  5. Don’t be afraid to ask crazy questions. I actually sometimes play a game of questions with guys I like. Ask them what their fav sex position is, or where they lost their virginity. Usual answer: doggy style and car.
  6. Don’t talk about future plans with them. Guys tend to spook easily like horses.
  7. I usually fool around with them on the third date, and sleep with them on the fourth. But do whatever feels right to you. Don’t let anyone tell you that you are a prude or a slut.
  8. Don’t be afraid to make the moves with guys you like. If I haven’t heard from a guy 4 days after meeting him at a bar then I will text him to ask him to get together. I’ve gotten plenty of dates that way.
  9. Try to date a few guys at once. All you need to get a date, is to have a date. It really is true usually. Plus it will keep you from falling to hard for one guy (which will usually make him want you more), and let you have a back up.
  10. Assume all guys are lying douchebags who only want to get in your pants, and then never see you again. When they’re not you’ll be pleasantly surprised. (Sorry boys, but to survive dating it helps to just assume it.)

Those are just a few tidbits I’ve learned. I’m a little jaded, but I date in NYC so I’ve seen it all.

Fountain in Washington Square park.

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How to get morning sex, or just sex in general from women is simple. Now I’m not telling you how to get a one night stand or what not, but I will help you understand women a bit ( or at least some women, we are all different). Just like guys women want what they can’t have. Guys love the thrill of the chase, but so do women. Everyone responds well to a little flirtation and then a bit of distance.

The original building of the Met which has been built around.

When I meet a guy in a bar, and he is all over me I am usually repelled by that. Last night I met a cute guy in a bar (and then my friend ditched me there without telling me, bitchy move), but this guy came on very strong. He kept getting very close to me, and being way more flirtatious than I was. I was disgusted, and even when he offered to buy me a drink I turned it down, and made an excuse and left. I rarely turn down free drinks, but I did not want to talk to this guy a minute longer.

Now when I am on a date with a guy, and he flirts with me a bit, but then pulls back and gives me some distance I want sex with him more. This one guy I dated would never try to come in to my place or anything. We would only kiss goodnight, until finally I made blatantly clear I wanted to sleep with him, and then he came in. I tend to wait longer to sleep with guys who I feel are only there for sex.

Now MORNING SEX. The same rules apply. I hate when I am still groggy and a guy is all over me, trying to get me into sex. Grinding against me with his hard on, and trying to finger me while I’m still dry. NO. The best way to get morning sex from me, and many of the women I’ve talked to is make it feel likes it’s our idea. Every woman has a turn on spot. Mine is my back of my neck, and this probably works on most women. Spoon her for a little bit (not sexually) and kiss the back of her neck a little bit, and then turn over and ignore her. When a guy does this then I’m the one who is wanting sex, and instead of wanting to push the guy away and go back to sleep I climb on top of him. Now it may not always work because sometimes you are to hungover or tired to care, and in these cases grinding your hard on into her wouldn’t have helped your case anyway.

So boys, don’t be overly aggressive. Flirt a bit, and then give distance. Don’t make us feel like you are trying to get us back to your place from the first minute, and we all see through the hey lets go have a drink on my rooftop or watch some tv excuse. Make us want to take you home, but remember that some women are too shy to make the first sexual move, so if you finally feel she’s into it you might still have to make the suggestion.

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Control and who has it is a very important part of sex. Knowing what you want and how you like it is a very important part, because how can you be in control if you don’t know what you want? At the same time you need to pay attention to what your partner wants. Now I can only speak from the girl perspective and tell you the kinds of men I’ve encountered.

I have a lot of photos of this fountain.

THE CONTROL FREAK: This is the guy who doesn’t pay attention or know at all what his partner wants. He basically fucks the girl like a jackhammer. There is no skill and no connection. He gets on top and just goes at it. He is in control because the guy is bigger and stronger and when a guy fucks you like this it is hard to get him to do better. These habits can be changed though. Tell him what you want and how you like it in a nice way. After you can tell him that you enjoyed the sex, but it might be better for you if it were FILL IN BLANK of what you want. If you don’t ask you won’t receive. And if nothing changes then find someone new.

NO CONTROL: Also a guy that is no fun is one that has no control. This guy doesn’t know what he wants, or is just too damned shy. Basically sex newbies. He is somewhat better than the first because at least you can try to take can control and make the sex better. I hate when a guy doesn’t know how to stay in beat with me, or help lead. They just lie (or is it lay?) when on bottom, and when on top it is still a snooze fest.

JUST RIGHT: It’s like when Goldilocks found the perfect bed. You want to find the just right amount of control. While there are some times (and some girls) who like to take total control and dominate, for the most part women want to be led, and dominated just a little bit. This guy is the one who holds you hips and controls your movements a bit, so that you two are in sync, but at the same time somewhat bases his movements on your lead as well. He is quick to suggest position changes, and knows where he wants you, but also asks you if it’s good for you. He holds your arms down sometimes, but not so roughly that you feel like you have no power (unless you both are comfortable enough to be completely dominated). This is the man who is a much better fuck than the rest.

In the end it all comes down to confidence. The men with too much or too little are both lacking confidence, while men who posses the right amount are content in themselves and this helps them in bed. Men follow this post, and women will appreciate it.

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Yesterday I had my third date with the British guy. We met up for drinks at a bar in his neighborhood. After a few margaritas we headed to his place to “watch” clips of the Argentina-Germany game. Instead as soon as we got into his place we began snogging. Usually the first time you fool around with someone there is a little bit of awkwardness or you feel a little unsure, but there was none of that here. We were making out against his kitchen table and he pulled his shirt off, which sent his sunglasses flying. We then headed straight for his room.

Just like this photo I took.

Once there I began to strip down to my black bra and black lace thong. I told him from the start I was not having sex with him that day. He was persistent in begging, but I held my ground. It was one of those time where you fool around and it is just passionate and hot. He had been out by the pool that day so he tasted salty. Usually I hate feeling sweaty during intimate times, but instead it was just sexy. He like most guys doesn’t understand the art of teasing, but it was still great. he finger me for a long time, and I gave him a handjob, and then we lay there for a while. According to him he hasn’t had sex or anything for the last couple months since he split with his ex, which makes it understandable that he would beg for sex.

I had plans so I had to leave soon, but before I did we took a shower together. This guy is six foot four, and as a tall girl that is a huge turn on for me. I had to hold my hair up to keep it from getting wet, but he soaped me down, and it felt amazing. He pushed me up against the shower wall and began kissing me, and I just wanted to fuck him right away. I didn’t though. I left after that and all I can say is I can’t wait to fuck him.

Of course then I went to see a male revue, and watching hot almost naked men did not help my horniness. There is something really funny about male strippers. Female strippers make sense to me, but male strippers while turning me on, make me laugh. They are outrageous, and I just know that every one of them is gay.

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I still remember the first blow job I ever gave. To this day it is still one of my worst sexual experiences. I’m fine with giving head now, and with guys who I am very attracted to, I actually enjoy it, but my first time was horrible.

I was a sophomore in high school. One of my guy friends and I had started routinely fooling around. At this point in time I had never had sex, and I don’t think I had even given a hand job. Mainly I had just made out, and been fingered, so I was not used to the male anatomy. I used to work as the cleaning maid for the business my dad owned, so one night my guy friends and I snuck in to have a slumber party. We didn’t even drink, we were that lame. Mainly we read Cosmo, and played Nintendo 64 on the tv we had brought.

My guy friend and I slip away to my dad’s office and we begin to fool around. I’ve decided already that I want to try giving him head. My advice for girls is to have sex before you give a guy a blow job. The first time you get up and close to a penis is a bit off putting. Sex is actually much easier and enjoyable than putting it in your mouth the first time you see one up and close. So I’m kind of grossed out, but I’ve already begun. I’m just attempting not to gag. It keeps going forever though. He just won’t finish, and my mouth is killing me, and the whole thing is so upsetting I just want to run and hide. Finally I just stop. He starts making fun of me and calling me a goober. We then go back to the group, and I spend the whole time feeling like I’m going to vomit.

Same fountain that I used in my header. It's in Central Park. Go see it!

Now here is my advice to men. Since then I have learned what types of guys I like giving blow jobs to, and if you follow my instructions you are much more likely to get them more often. DEMONSTRATE that you enjoy it. You don’t have to yell or make tons of noise, but I love going down on a guy who makes a little bit of noise, and who I can tell I am doing a great job on. If you’re just silent and lay there, I will probably never give you a blow job again. Also don’t expect a girl to go until your done. I love giving head as a precursor to sex, and if a guy is good with this he most likely will get some head every time before sex. Lastly give head to get head. If you won’t go down on me, there is no way in hell I’m going down on you. If a guy goes down on me, and is actually good at it I want to return the favor. If you just slobber all over my lady parts I don’t care about your parts.

Now I’m not always the same as every girl, because I don’t let myself get pressured into stuff I don’t want to do. I just say no. I can sleep with a guy I don’t like that much, but I have to care at least a bit about you to give you head (Or you’re just so awesome in bed that I feel the need to please you as well).

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